Salute English Teacher

Salute English Teacher

One fine morning in London, an English billionaire was taking a walk with his dog. 
Suddenly a Pakistani man runs out from the bushes in front of him and shot the poor dog three times.
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The dog died.
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The billionaire screamed at the killer,"Why did you do that".
The killer answered, "Your Wife gave me
£ 50000 and said "Go kill that son of a bitch"
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The billionaire hugged the killer & with tears in his eyes said... "I am forever grateful to your English teacher"🤗🤗🤗🤪😜

Medication in varanasi

A white American friend, his wife, and their 12 year old daughter had spent the last week in Varanasi and he reached America today. Needlessly to say, the lack of infrastructure initially shocked them. They slowly got used to it. Two days before his departure, their daughter suddenly had trouble breathing in the middle of the night. She is prone to allergens. The parents panicked.

They rushed to the lobby of the guest house. There was none at the reception. The security guard was an old man who appeared inebriated and didn't speak a word of English. However, he rushed to the room, understood what was going on, and then called his wife at home over the mobile phone. His wife responded and rushed to the nearest doctor, woke him up, and sent him to the guesthouse. In less than 10 minutes, the doctor was at the guesthouse. The guard's wife anticipated the need for prescription medication and woke up the neighborhood pharmacist. Most pharmacies in India are a hole in the wall, very efficient, and the pharmacist usually lives right beside the pharmacy.

Long story short, the girl received her medication and the best care. The bill? The doctor didn't accept any payment. He just dismissed my friend with a wave of his hand and went away. The security guard had gone back to sleep. The medication cost less than INR 200.

My friend's remark: "Actually mate, the system is very efficient. The doctors don't waste time having lengthy conversation. The way they instill confidence in the child has to be seen to be believed. I think it is the wealth of experience. The girl, who was in panic a minute ago, calmed down seeing the body language of the doctor. You don't have this extensive ambulance and ER racket. People are resourceful."

"So, how is your daughter now? Is she too glad to be back in America?"

"Oh, my wife and daughter are in love with Varanasi. They extended their stay by a week."

वाया : Kalavai Venkat

Time to Time Update & Upgrade

Changes are required in life to survive, please read some examples.... A man Kearns from mistake, be a man learn from others mistake........###########.. In 1998, Kodak employed 1,70,000 employees and sold 85% of the world's photo papers. Within the last few years, digaital photography made them out of the market. Kodak went bankrupt and all his staff came on the road. .

HMT (clock)
BAJAJ (scooter)
DYNORA (TV)
MURPHY (radio)
NOKIA (Mobile)
RAJDOOT (bike)
AMBASDOR (car)

Friends,
There was no shortage of quality at all, yet they were out of the market !!
reason???
They have not changed over time. !!

You have an idea that in the coming 10 years, the world will change completely and 70 to 90% of the people running today will be closed.

Welcome to the 4th Industrial Revolution ...

Uber is just a software. He does not have a single car of his own, despite this he is the world's largest taxi company.

Airbnb is the world's largest hotel company, while they do not have a single hotel of their own.

There are many examples like paytm, ola cabs, oyo rooms.

There is no work left for young lawyers in the US now because the software named IBM Watson gives better legal advice throughout the moment. In the next 10 years, 90% of Americans will become unemployed ... who will save 10% ... they will be Super Specialists.

The software named Watson is diagnosed with 4x Accuracy of Cancer compared to humans. By 2030 the computer will be more intelligent than humans.

By 2018, Driverless cars will land on the roads. By 2020, this single invention will start to change the whole world.

90% cars will disappear from the streets of the world in the next 10 years ... Those who will survive will either have electric cars or hybrid ... roads will be empty, consumption of petrol will decrease by 90%, all Arab countries will become bankrupt .

You will request a car from a software like Uber and in a few moments, a driverless car will be parked at your door ... if you share it with someone, that ride will be cheaper than your bike.

Due to being a driverless of cars, 99% of accidents will stop. This will stop the business of Car Insurance.

No employment like a driver will survive on earth. When 90% cars will disappear from cities and roads, problems like Traffic and Parking will end automatically ... because a car will be equal to 20 cars today.

From today 5 or 10 years ago, there was no such place where there is no PCO. Then when the mobile phone came in all the pockets, the PCO started to shut down. Then all the PCO people started selling the phone again. Now the recharge is also going on line.

Have you ever noticed ..?

Nowadays every third store in the market is now mobile phone.
sale, service, recharge, accessories, repair, maintenance.

Now all is done by Paytm .. Now people have started booking railway tickets with their phones. Now the transaction of money is also changing. Currency Note was replaced by Plastic Money and now Digital becomes Transactions are

The world is changing very fast .. Keep the eye ears nose open or else you will lose ...

Prepare to change over time.

Hence...
The person should continue to make changes in his business and his nature over time.
 
"Time to Time Update & Upgrade"

Run with time and get success.

Hearing problem

An Old man goes to an audiologist for his hearing problem.g audiologist gives him a nice powerful hearing aid.

A month later the old man goes back for check up. The audiologist asks him how is the hearing now. He says it's marvellous.

So your family must  be very pleased says the audiologist. 

Old man answers : Haven't told the family about my hearing aid. I just sit and listen to everyone's conversation.  *In last one month I have changed my WILL 5 times*

Brave lady yashodharA

When I heard the story of Gautam Buddha, my question was always about his wife and son that he left behind...this write-up by Vikram Bhattacharya touches that part of the story 
---------------

He left her in the middle of the night, the night their son was
born. When she heard the news
she was devastated.

Yet, she did not complain but her
life lost all meaning. The only
reason for her to live now was
her son. She wanted him to grow
up to be a man that the world
would look up to.

Her friends and relatives came
around and asked her to forget
about the man who had left her
and start life again.

They asked her to marry again
but she refused. She was young
& beautiful & suitors queued up
outside her door, but she refused each one of them.

Then one fine day he came back !

He stood in front of her and she could hardly remember him as the man who had left her. “They call you the Buddha now?” she asked him gently.

“I hear they do,” he answered in
a calm fashion.

“What does it mean?” she further inquired.

“I think it means the enlightened one, a knower,” he informed.

She smiled and then a silence.
“I suppose we have both learned something. Your lessons O Buddha, will make the world richer in spirit, but my lesson will unfortunately remain largely unknown.”
she reflected deeply....

“ And what lesson is that ? ”
  The Buddha probed.

Her eyes sparkled with unshed tears, “That a courageous woman does not need anyone to complete her.....
SHE IS COMPLETE ON HER OWN ”

Saluting womanhood for the Yashodhara spirit. !!! 

Happy Drinking

A husband wakes up with a hangover. He opens his eyes n sees aspirins and water.

He sits down & sees his clothes all clean & pressed....

He takes the aspirin & finds a note "Honey, breakfast is on table, I left to buy groceries. Love you"

Totally shocked,

He goes to the kitchen for breakfast. There he finds his son & asks him "What happened last night ?".

Son says: "Well Dad u came home.  @ 3am, drunk & delirious, broke all  crockery, puked in the hall & made a total mess....

Confused he asks, "then why is everything in order?"

Son says, "Oh! Mom dragged u to the room tried to take ur clothes off & you said *"LADY LEAVE ME ALONE,  I'M MARRIED!"*
*I cant cheat my wife....*

*MORAL:*

Self induced hangover - Rs.4000/_
Broken Crockery - Rs.10000/_
But....
Saying the right things when drunk........

*PRICELESS !!
Happy Drinking

Can you make a sentence without using 'E'?"

Once Ishwarchandra Vidyasagar wrote to Madhusudhan Dutt, "As you are a master in English, can you make a sentence without using 'E'?"

Madhusudan Dutt responded with this...

"I doubt I can. It’s a major part of many many words. Omitting it is as hard as making muffins without flour. It’s as hard as spitting without saliva, napping without a pillow, driving a train without tracks, sailing to Russia without a boat, washing your hands without soap. And, anyway, what would I gain? An award? A cash bonus? Bragging rights? Why should I strain my brain? It’s not worth doing."